Thursday, December 23, 2010

Dec 23rd~ New Name

New name.
Let's meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?

It would be Diana...pronounced in Spanish...Dee Anna. Does that make sense? When I left college and began working it got switched to Diana like...Princess Diana. I answer to anything but Diana (Dee~Anna) is who I am. That is what my family calls me, my close friends, my husband and myself. I think it became a pain to correct or repeat when I was on the phone so I would just say Diana and make it easier. And it has been about 5 years now that it became an "issue" so it is hard to have people switch ...usually they think it is something, a phase, I am going through.

Oh well! That would be the name.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Dec. 17th -22nd.....catching up

So I have been out of pocket for a while. Let do the catch up game.

December 17 – Lesson Learned. What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward? (Author: Tara Weaver)

I thought I was very independent and self sufficient. This year I learned that as great as those qualities may be I need people. I need help and there is no shame in that. I also learned that I expect too much from people. I know that seems impossible but I do. I learned that my support system is amazing and I would not be who I am without them.


December 18 – Try. What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? (Author: Kaileen Elise)


Next year ( not too far away). I want to try to find some sort of balance that works for me. I am going to be a 1st time parent and just want to be good for her. I want to find the joys in the little things and less stress in the everyday stuff. I want to be able to truly see the amazing "stuff" happening in front of me and not in retrospect. I want to enjoy as it happens.

As far as trying new things. I think parenthood will play a big role in that.


December 19 – Healing. What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011? (Author: Leonie Allan)


My brother. My younger, amazing brother. If you know anything about us.... we are true optimistic pessimists. We always seem to be on opposite ends. And when I was at my most pessimist side he gave me the world's greatest advice. Given he quoted a movie but none the less...great advice. " I am the captain of my fate...the master of my soul."

I couldn't let a few people change that. I needed to be reminded of that. He told me who I was and how much I could let things effect me or I could feel the pain for as long as I needed and then let go because of who I was. He helped me heal.

December 20 – Beyond Avoidance. What should you have done this year but didn’t because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?) (Author: Jake Nickell)

I will have to get back to you on this one.


December 21 – Future Self. Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? (Bonus: Write a note to yourself 10 years ago. What would you tell your younger self?) (Author: Jenny Blake)

Wow. That is a while. I don't know. I will be 35. Have a 5 year old. I would be married for 8 years. I don't know. It doesn't seem possible to know what will be. Or what should I say to myself.

I guess I would say this:

Love like it will never hurt, enjoy the moments, make memories, never stop dreaming, strive to be the best of you and expect no less, remain strong but be willing to be weak when you need others, remember where you started and always look forward...dance with your best friend...


December 22 – Travel How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year? (Author: Tara Hunt)

I took a anniversary trip to Fredricksburg. Loved every minute of it. We also went to New Orleans for my graduation. Next year I would love to travel to see my brother and my aunts and uncles. I would love to have them meet my little family.


Thursday, December 16, 2010

Dec. 16th~ Friendship

Friendship.
How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?

This one is hard to answer. This year I was let down by a group of friends. But on the upside I was lifted up by a completely different group. And that is where I am going to focus on. I was talking to my mom this weekend and telling her how blessed I have been. I truly believe in the fact that God puts people in your life for a reason. I have made some really amazing friends this year that lifted me up when I was most let down by the group of friends that I thought loved me the most. They embraced me, supported me, helped me, were excited for me and most importantly loved me.

A few examples of what they did for me this year: Threw/hosted/attended my baby shower(s), helped put up a decal in my little one's room, took the day off of work to go to garage sales, let me cry, vent, and be angry, kept up on my appointments, called/texted/emailed me to see how I was doing, and so many other things that made me understand what a friend can do for you.

God gradually put people in my life throughout this past year. And I am so grateful for that. These new friends few like they have been there the entire time. I am blessed, truly blessed to have been given the opportunity to have such an amazing (favorite word) group of friends all walk in to my life this past year. And I only hope that we continue to walk with each other.

So the new found perspective on the world because of these friendship should be summarized as this: Life is sweet because of those you let in.....and these friends have helped me see the beauty in the even the saddest moments.

TO MY FRIENDS: May you always know how much you are loved by me and may we continue to lift each other up and walk with each other through all the ups and downs life will bring.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

December 15 – 5 Minutes

December 15 – 5 Minutes

Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010. (Author: Patti Digh)

Jamie missing his flight to Ecuador and the breakfast afterwards.

Alayna & Nadia first day in the world.

Fredricksburg.

Fancy Nancy & Rene

New Orleans, Drew Brees, my graduation,

Dad playing slots in the casino for the first time

Mom's little eyes when she saw the Mississippi River

JD's face when I showed him the pregnancy test results and when heard the heartbeat for the first time.

Rafa when we announced we were pregnant.

They kids swimming class.

Aly & Katie's recital

Matthew body slamming a bully in his class.

Mikki not wanting me in her rancho.

My showers.

Texas game.

Putting up the decal in the nursery.

Scratch off tickets.

There is too much. I loved it all.




December 14 – Appreciate

December 14 – Appreciate
What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it? (Author: Victoria Klein)


Family. That is a short and sweet answer. This year I turned down my dream job because I was not ready to let go of the relationship my sisters and I had created in the last few years. My youngest brother, confidant, and best friend joined the Peace Corp. His departure has been hard for me. I am so proud of him and everything he does but I miss his face. That sounds weird but I miss seeing his eyes wrinkle up when he is having a blast and the hand gestures when he is upset. This year my nephew, my brother's son, had a stint in the hospital with a tumor. My brothers are so different and so amazing in their own ways. Each of them loves me in such a different way. They are not word guys...more on the action side. One is expecting his first just like me and it has been so interesting to see how our relationship has become so different because we are entering a new phase of life together. Then there is my oldest brother who is getting married. And something about that has made him more of a equal than my older brother. And then there are my parents. Maybe it is because I turned the big 3-0 this year or because I am about to be a parent myself but I don't think I have ever appreciated them more than I have this year. They have been everything to me and my husband this year. They have said the most amazing things to me at the most random moments. I realize I am leaving out so many family members but each of them I love so much.

Then there is the family I married into. My in laws are amazing (my favorite word for 2010). They have done it all this year. From assisting in laying a beautiful hardwood floor in my home to driving across the state to attend my graduation to buying my baby's crib. They support and love me like a daughter and I couldn't be happier about it. I truly hit the in-law lottery when I married their son. And that family doesn't end with them but they are just an example of the blessings I have appreciated this year.

So to summarize this year. Life is too precious. The whole world might let you down and sometimes so will family but they are always there doing their best to support and love you in a way no one else can.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Dec 13 – Action

December 13 – Action
When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step? (Author: Scott Belsky)


This next year I want to be more organized. Which I understand may be near impossible because my life is going to drastically change because of my new little one. But that is the reason for me wanting that. Not for control but for more time with her. I don't want to be so overwhelmed by life that I miss the moments.

I want to be that parent who enjoys it all and is not so overwhelmed and busy to appreciate my little one. I also want to enjoy my husband. I don't have plans to make all this happen. But I do believe in mind over matter. So lets see how well this works out.

December 12 – Body Integration

December 12 – Body Integration

This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? (Author: Patrick Reynolds)

Hmmm.... This is a odd question. I am making up my own on this one. Last night, my little one made the craziest move my body had ever felt. My stomach seriously looked like a conehead. Do you remember the coneheads? It was the oddest yet the most amazing thing to witness. She needed room to stretch and she did. My body was no obstacle for her. I still can't get over that I have a life within me. That is an amazing feeling.

Dec. 11th~ Things

December 11 –11 Things
What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life? (Author: Sam Davidson)

Hmm.....11 things....that seems like a lot. 1.)Procrastination. How to get rid of that? I am constantly working on organizing myself to help eliminate this issue. Hopefully, this will give me more time for my new little family 2.) My Neon. I need to get rid of my old car. It will clear my driveway and maybe add a few bucks in my pocket 3.) Lily. My brother in law's dog. She needs to go back home. Three dogs is too much with a new baby on the way 4.) My carpet. Hopefully this will help eliminate some of the strange odor in our guest room and allergies. 5.) Mortgage payment. For obvious reasons. More money into our savings. 6.) Extra weight. It would be nice to fit back into my clothes again after the baby. 7.) I don't need Stress. But reality check it comes with the territory.

Okay that is my list. I may continue to add but all that my little brain can do. Since I am still behind on the last few days.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Dec. 10th~ Wisdom

Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

The wisest thing I did this year? Hmmm. I think I became more open to the idea of needing people. Let me explain. The last few years I have cocooned myself into a select few people that I hang out with and was friends with. I relied heavily on this group. This last year I realized that is not me at all. I have never been so closed off before. I do not believe I was aware of this. Or that I was making a
conscience choice to change it . I think it began with one small moment that open the flood gates. The great part about this it I have made some truly great friends this year. Friends that I can not imagine not being in my life.

It is quite strange for me to realize this. I believe God knows who He puts in your path for great reasons. And He placed these amazing people in my life because I needed to be reminded of how loved I truly am for being me. I was let down this year by my little "circle" but because I was surrounded by these new friends I realized that....1) Life is too short to hold grudges 2). That when you least expected it you are blessed with so much 3). And that friends are not those who have known you the longest but those you love you for who you are and who walk with you through the biggest changes in your life.

So, the wisdom I learned this year. Surround yourself with people that love you and be open to those who God has put in your path.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

December 9 – Party Prompt: Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans. (Author: Shauna Reid)

Party? I had several baby showers. I mean a lot of showers. Each one was different and so much fun. The best part of it was not gifts but the excitement I felt when I walked in. My first one in my husband's hometown was full of women who were so extremely excited. I seriously was overwhelmed with all the love I was shown by them. They showered me with gifts, advice, food, hugs and kisses...all because of this little bundle I was expecting and they had yet to meet. It is hard to explain the feeling of being surrounded by people who are so excited for you and your little one. It is so surreal, the feeling of truly being loved.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Dec. 8th~ Beautifully Different

December 8 – Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful. (Author: Karen Walrond)


I like this question but it is still very difficult to answer. It sounds a boastful. What makes me different? I am an optimistic pessimist. I think I get it from my mother. I always want to see the good in people and situations. Yet I feel it is important to feel what is going on at the moment and not sugar coat anything even when it is a little more painful than I would like. I think that I am loving...sometimes more than others think I should be. But love is so important. And I think with being loving I am accepting of others.

Now for the pessimistic part of myself. I can be very obsessive......well I would say passionate would be a better word to describe me. I can get on an issue and not let it go for a while. But I think that actually has to do with the loving part of me.

I love to laugh at the chaos of life. I call it like I see it (sometimes I buffer or filter). I love to make fun of the absolute silliness of people that they do not see in themselves. I poke fun at life and sometimes it makes the awful appear funny. I think laughter is a way to deal.

So passionate, loving and enjoying the crazy. That is me!!

REVERB 10

Okay, so my dear friend, Elizabeth has been faithfully committed to participating in Reverb 10. Which in turn has caused me to reflect on the prompts as well. So, I thought I would participate too. Let's see how it goes. I am going to do a synopsis of the last 7 days that I have missed. Here it goes.

December 1 – One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you? (Author: Gwen Bell)

Whirlwind. That would be my word. I choose this word because it has gone by so fast and I can't believe it. So much happened, changed, and been revealed to me that I am not sure where time went.

For 2011, I would choose the word, bountiful. I want my year to be described as full. Full of love, family, challenges, blessings, time, positive energy. I realize that this might lead to chaos but even in the chaos I want to see beauty
.

December 2 – Writing. What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it? (Author: Leo Babauta)

I stress myself out with time. I do not use time to its' best ability. I waste time when I shouldn't and I rush it when I should enjoy it. Can I change this? I think so. I think I can become better organized that the minor things in life don't become so overwhelming and take away time from me to enjoy writing again.

December 3 – Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors). (Author: Ali Edwards)

I am not into retreats. I feel like I have been there, done that, got a t shirt kinda thing about retreats. Not that they do not have merit. I just feel that personally I am somewhere different. I attended a retreat in April of this year and had a moment that I have yet to figure out. The weekend was great. I meet so many wonderful women and had a good time. It was the last morning and we sat in a circle, holding hands with the people next to us. I believe there was either music or a prayer going on or possibly both. I was holding my friend Nancy's hand. I could not focus. I kept hearing a voice, my voice saying, "Touch is healing...tell her that healing beings with touch." I know it sounds weird. I didn't hear this booming voice, I heard my own telling me that my new friend needed to hear those words. No idea why but I needed to tell her. Forget what was going on, prayer or no prayer. When we finally let go....I told my friend those words. And she knew what they meant. It was powerful. That day I learned that my voice (God's voice) speaks to me all the time but I often times put it on mute. Anyways this moment was big for me because I needed to be reminded that "my inner voice" is valid and I needed to give it more credit and listen more to it.

December 4 – Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year? (Author: Jeffrey Davis)-

I don't know if I can take complete credit for this. I am expecting and wonder has definitely been a part of my life since May of this year when I learned we were pregnant. Hearing a heartbeat that is not your own but within you causes wonder beyond belief. I am constantly in awe (& wonder) of this little person inside of me. And the fact that my body has adjusted to this little person, making room for her, her movement to sound (particularly her daddy's voice), this is just to name a few.

December 5 – Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? (Author: Alice Bradley)

I am still working on this. I think I am pretty good a letting go of things and people (which is scary) to begin with. I try not to hold on to too much.

December 6 – Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it? (Author: Gretchen Rubin)

The last thing I made was hair bows. I made several hair bows for my nieces. I would like to learn to make little dresses......which is weird because I don't like dresses but I would like to make my little one a dress. I would also like to make some aprons, curtains, scarves, just tons of crafty project that I would give as gifts. But I definitely need more time.

December 7 – Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011? (Author: Cali Harris)

I mentioned early that I had attended a retreat back in April. Well, that is where I found community. Interestingly enough! These wonderful and amazing women have been such a support for me throughout my pregnancy. I did not expect that at all. They have been excited when I was terrified. They have showered me with love when I have been at rock bottom. They have shown me that even though they only met me in April that love knows no time constraint. You can truly love someone and have only begun to get to know them. I felt the loss of some sense of friendship this year and these women have lifted me up. They have surrounded me with such amazing love. They showed me that I am loved by so many people and that is where my focus should be not on my expectations of others.
I would like to continue with this church community and possibly become more involved in various opportunities offered through this community.